August 30

 

the never ending story of my stupid eye.

 

 

 

So back when the whole eye thing landed me in the hospital, I was pretty out of it, so much so that I have no recollection of being told anything or receiving any advice as to what I needed to DO for it. Keep it hot? Keep it cold? Lance it? I have no idea. I was unconscious. They didn't really give me any discharge words of wisdom either beyond "Try not to ever do that again, ok?" Well, thanks!

A week or so later (after my surgery) I was still sufficiently freaked out about the unpleasant lump and discoloration that I went to see a doctor. She basically said "You're lucky it's only a lump. You could have had a brain bleed, I can't believe no one monitored you. You could have BLINDED YOURSELF". Ahh!

After I got back from Canada, I somehow managed to get bronchitis. I went to the doctor (a different doctor), and she treated me for the cough and while I was sitting there, I asked her about my eye because by that time I'd long since noticed that my eyebrow was non-functional. She touched it and asked me a few questions and said "Well, I imagine you did some pretty serious nerve damage to that part of your head, with such a sudden, blunt impact. Nerves take a while to reroute. I'm sure you'll be ok."

I went for a follow up (for surgery, not for eye stupidity) with my WOMAN DOCTOR and we chatted and she read me the notes the interventional radiologist had faxed over about my procedure and I asked "Does he mention my eye anywhere in there?" I went on to tell her about what I'd done and she told me that she had once accidentally cut through someone's nerve, and it grew back, so I shouldn't really worry, it would just take a while.

I stopped worrying about it. I mean, I didn't stop thinking about it, because I can FEEL the heaviness and the non-motion. I'm a pretty animated person, so not being able to move part of my face is sort of a big deal, even if it is only my eyebrow. Oh, and additionally, the trauma to my eye set off my alopecia and MADE MY EYEBROW FALL OUT. Or some of it. Yeah, I'm awesome. Oh, did I mention that I've also been having a lot more floaters in my eyes? Gray patches in my vision? Sensational!

About a week ago, I was in the lab talking to someone and I noticed he was sort of staring at me weirdly. Everyone knows what happened, since it happened at work and a lot of people were around. He said "you know, your forehead is swollen and discolored" OF COURSE it was. I started making doctors appointments. I go back to the GP who'd seen me when it was looking really bad, in early June.

Reason for discoloration? Unknown.

Reason for swelling? Unknown. Possible pooling of blood. STILL.

Numbness? Nerve Damage.

Paralysis of eyebrow? Nerve damage, and a "I'm going to say with about 60 percent certainty that you won't be able to move more than the outer part of your brow again"

Reason I feel tingling behind my ear when I scratch my forehead? Nerve damage.

 

This morning I went off to the eye doctor, feeling sort of like a giant hypochondriac about the whole thing. But, I made the appointment so I went. I told the sad story of my busted head, and the subsequent floaters (note: I am not going to another doctor for at least 3 months, and I MEAN IT and I'm NEVER BRINGING UP MY FOREHEAD AGAIN) they gave me the numbing drops and dilated my pupils. He examines me and declares that I did absolutely no damage to my eyes with the fall, which makes me happy, and I get up to go. "BUT", he continued "Has anyone ever talked to you about the nerves on that part of your face?"

He went on to explain the following: There is a nerve bundle controlling each side of the face. It begins just behind the ear and radiates up over the eyebrow. The center of the eyebrow is (as he put it) like a fountain of nerves. These nerves control all aspects of facial movement and sensation, including the ability to move eyebrows. AND ALSO THAT SIDE OF YOUR FACE.

Discoloration? Unknown.

Numbness & Paralysis: IRREVERSABLE NERVE DAMAGE. That's right, he did say IRREVERSABLE.

The bright side: "It's astonishing that you didn't paralyze half your face doing this. You're lucky it was just your eyebrow"

 

Yeah, I'm not going back to any doctors about my head unless it sprouts a horn or begins bleeding, since every time I ask about it, the news I get is worse than the previous news. See the lumpy photo of me up top? That's forever me, baby. I'm AWESOME!!!!

 

the other day - home - email - soon