March 25
 
 

 
 
 

Mirror, Woman In:

See, a bunch of you have asked about my hair.  Here's the thing:  you can't tell that anything new or exciting is going on.  It just looks like hair.  In a photograph, you'd never know what I was talking about unless you knew the backstory, which you all do.  So, there you go.  Hair.  But MORE of it.  The night I had it done, I tried really hard to take photos of myself where you'd be able to tell what I was talking about, but it just never happened.  I got a lot of fun photographs of my bathroom walls (BEFORE I went all Weekend Warrior on 'em), shower curtain, and TONS of photos of me in the mirror with the flash in my face so it looked a little like I was a sunburst.  In the end, I just wasted a bunch of time and it didn't make one bit of difference.  If you feel like you're being robbed of some hair experience with me, by all means, come on over and pet my hair.
 
 

Injury, Self:

Last monday, I made an appointment to go see my dentist because my tooth was bothering me.  My dentist is about a half mile away from my brother and sister in law's house, so I figured that I'd stop over afterwards to spread a little of my sunshine.  Long story short, I wound up staying for dinner.  Before dinner, however, I was walking from my car to the path up to the house, and I must have caught my heel on something and found myself spiralling shins first into a row of giant boulders (okay, they're not so much BOULDERS as they are large rocks.  Think beachball, not Flinstones).  The next morning, I woke and looked down at my aching legs and saw that I'd pretty much bruised myself from knee down on both legs.

I've watched the bruises with fascination.  The pretty colors!  Right.  Last night, I stepped out of the shower and sat down in my computer room.  My feet were hurting (have I ever told you how much I love the expression "My dogs are barking"?  I would have written it there but I felt that it merited some explanation, because I love the phrase so much I didn't want to throw it out there and not let you all know) so, I decided that rubbing them with cream would be just the thing to make them feel better.  As I did, I noticed that on the more bruised of my two legs--the right--I also managed to bruise my INNER ANKLE and some of my foot.

I thought back to the fall, and I am 100 percent certain that at no point during my trip (hah, hah!) outside did I remove my shoes.  There was never a moment before, during or after the fall that my shoes flew off my feet.  How then, I ask, did I bruise my ankle?  A mystery for the ages!!
 

Best Song Ever, The:

Here are a few songs out right now which with I am physically and mentally unable to cope:

·  The Loathesome Cheryl Crow's cover of "The First Cut is the Deepest"

·  Anything Outkast has playing on the radio.

·  No Doubt's "Its My Life"  (note:  what is it with Gwen Stefani covering and ruining songs I happen to love?  She ALSO covered a Bryan Ferry song, and I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT, ok?)

·  The one where a pissed off, kind of untalented Fred Durst sounding guy sings at the same time as some chick who undoubtedly dresses in rag-like dresses and has flowing black haie.  It goes a little like:

Guy:  RAH RAH RAH RAH RTAHHHHH!!!
Chick:  LaAAAAAAAA LAAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLAAALALALOOOOO!!! SOMETHING SOMMMEEETTTHINNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!

If there's a video for the song, I think it is the kind where they all turn into white birds and fly around.  Because they're LAME.

Ugh, it sucks.  Trust me, you KNOW the song I mean.

·  The one by creepy eyed Jessica Simpson pretending to understand why she's making fun of herself, when clearly she does not.

·  The new one by Alicia Keys.  I sometimes imagine an Alliyah/Left Eye end to her life very soon, and it makes me happier than it should.
 

Those are songs that suck.  The best song ever is the Work Song.  Don't know it?  Oh, you will.  It goes:
 

A-one! A-two! A-one TWO THREE YEAH!!!

I love work!!!!
I LOVE WORK!!!

WORK, I LOVE YOUUUUUUU!!!!!!
WORK IS AWESOME !!!!!

WORK WORK WORK!!!! WORK!!!
YEAH!!!

WORK!!!!

WORRRRKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!

THERE IS NO PLACE I WOULD RATHER BEEEEEEE!!!

WORK!!!!!
 

It goes on from there for as long as you'd like.   Take a few moments to memorize the words, and feel free to share it with all your homies, but don't forget! Its COPYRIGHTED!!!
 
 
 

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