December 18, 1999
This isn't really an entry. I'm writing mainly to tell you that Nick and I watched the Star Wars Christmas Special as we were decorating our tree (thank you, oh person who wishes to remain unnamed, for sending it my way). Oh, my god. My brain hurts. It was so piss poor, I didn't even know what to do, I couldn't decide what was the worst thing about it. I mean, kitsch is kitsch, but this was a whole different ball of bees. It was painful. Carrie Fisher was obviously doped up to her eyes, which, for your information, she couldn't manage to keep looking in the same direction, ever. Bea Arthur should never sing. Why was she? Why was Art Carney there? Why did he have hair like Squiggy?
Dianne Carrol (note: I know there's an H in her name somewhere. I went to altavista to do a search for the correct spelling. Do you have any thoughts as to what "tinypussies" might have had to do with Dianne Carrol? I don't either, unless it was because of the character she was playing. We saw none of that, however. A shame, as it might have livened things up a bit.) as HoloPorn star? Why? (when the segment began, Nick said "Look! It's Solid Gold!" and when Dianne appeared, I continued "with your hostess, Marilyn McCoo!")
I will never, ever again doubt the words of drunken partygoers. I swear it. There IS a Chewbacca Planet (what planet? All we ever saw was the Chewbacca treehouse). I am forever damaged because of this experience. For god's sake, the first 10 minutes was nothing but the Chewbacca family making noises at one another. I need to stop thinking about it. You all warned me. I have no one to blame but myself.
The cartoon with Boba Fett was cool, though. "I'll get you, friend.." He's perfectly menacing. I need me a helmet like that.
Stalk, Stalk, Stalk:
Bought a new Big Head Todd and The Monsters tape today. I listened to it in the car on the way home from the Trumball Mall (actually, the place is called a "shopping park", excuse the holy hell out of me). I kept saying to myself "This is what they're going to sound like, Dana!! God, your birthday is going to ROCK!". I'm usually not a fan of live albums. This one kicks ass. I love these guys. It would be so very wrong for them not to play for me. So, my stalking continues.
Though, I have to wonder. Does my stalking count if they don't know I'm doing it? Someone needs to tell them. Perhaps they'll take pity on me and play out of pity. A pity party. Woo! Works for me.
From, These Days Without You, Big Head Todd & The Monsters:
These days have got me down upon my knees
Amazed at what I never thought I'd need
If I could have you I would try
Not to let slip by,
For what once seemed so important to meAnd when I wake up,
I reach over for you,
No I won't stray cause,
I'm troubled for youThese days I'm counting on the sun to take
And find me dreaming that you'd gone away
And wake to hear you grumble along
Lord I've been so wrong
And sorry for the things I didn't sayAnd when I wake up,
I reach over for you,
No I won't stray cause,
I'm troubled for youThese days without you know they're gonna end
Cause time can't come between two better friends
And what I can't see I will find
Cannot lose it's shine
And what is broken time is gonna mend
I swear I'll stop talking about them, eventually. When they agree to play at my party. Hah!
yesterday/home/email/tomorrow, monday, who knows?
Oh, have any of you seen "Mojo", the Austin Powers cologne for sale? I did, today. At Lord and Taylor, for christ's sake.
Moment of Clarity: If you need to wear Mojo cologne, you have none. If you think it's amusing to own a product tie in cologne, you probably have no woman (or whatever's your bag, baby) to wear it around.
